本篇文章將提供一篇 Task 1 的學生範文，然後我會提供修改建議，正在準備IELTS的朋友可以參考看看。
題目如下:
The chart below shows the changes that took place in three different areas of crime in Newport city centre from 2003-2012.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
學生範文:
The line graph gives information about the number of three different crimes in Newport inner city between 2003 and 2012.
It is noticeable that the majority of crimes decreased over the period.
In 2003, burglary was the highest, which made up nearly 3500 times.The figure went up to its peak at 3750 incidents in the following year.
After this year, the figure had fallen dramatically to a bottom in 1200 times. There was, then, slight increase in 1750 times at the end of period.
Turning to car stealing, approximately 2800 incidents occurred at the starting period. This trend dropped to a bottom that the lowest number of
2000 times in 2006. Subsequently, this trend had risen moderately and overtaken the number of burglary in the middle of 2006, then stood at
its 2003 figure. However, the number of robbery fluctuated between 500 and 900 incidents throughout the period.
Overall, burglary initially was the most serious problem in Newport city, while car theft became a rigor criminal issue at the end of the period.
修改建議:
The line graph gives [u1] information about the numbers of three different crimes in Newport inner city between 2003 and 2012. It is noticeable that the majority[u2] of crimes decreased over the period.
In 2003, burglary was the highest[u3] , which made up nearly 3500 times. The figure went up to its peak at 3750 [u4] in the following year. After this year, the figure fell[u5] dramatically to the bottom[u6] . There was, then, a slight increase in[u7] 1750 times at the end of period[u8] .
Turning to car stealing, approximately 2800 cases were reported at the starting period[u9] . This trend dropped[u10] to the bottom that the lowest number[u11] of 2000 times in 2006[u12] . Subsequently, this trend[u13] rose moderately and outnumbered the casesin 2006, then stood at its 2003 figure[u14] . On the other hand, the number of robbery fluctuated between 500 and 900 throughout the period.
Overall, burglary was the most serious problem in Newport city initially, while car theft became the most serious crimeat the end of the period.
[u1]give比較偏向是口語用字。建議使用provide/contain
[u2]總數少(可以輕易數出) 的情形一般不使用majority
[u3]不夠明確。是歷史最高點，還是相較於其他兩者而言。
[u4]這邊不需要單位(incident)
[u5]應用過去簡單式
[u6]‘fall to the bottom’ 已經是一個焦點，不太需要再加上次數。一定要加的話建議用附加方式書寫。
[u7]表示”哪方面的增加”，後面不能接次數。
[u8]應更清楚地寫明時間點
[u9]應更清楚地寫明時間點
[u10]“趨勢”不會”往下掉”，只有”上升(或下降)” 的趨勢
[u11]語意重複
[u12]同註解6
[u13]同註解10
[u14]寫法需修改
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